If The Army Wanted You to Have a Spouse...

They would have issued you one.... right? In honor of "National Military Spouse Appreciation Day" I just had to throw that out there. This is pretty ironic to me as I was just thinking to myself on my way into work tonight (to work a 12 hour shift after no cat nap today and the washing machine breaking and the kid in trouble at school again and the toddler sick and the housework that got done) that I was feeling a little under-appreciated lately. My husband has been in full "I am the brand new LT" mode at work and just a tad over-zealous to prove himself. Naturally, I am picking up the household slack and still managing to work nights. (Let me formally invite you to the pity party.) Well, now that I know I have a day of appreciation in my honor - I feel better---NOT! In all seriousness, I really think the appreciation belongs to the spouses that are caring for injured Service members. Most are living a life that few can imagine. Part nurse-part spouse, this is a full time labor of love for them. Much love and respect for these gals today.


As for me, I am almost 9 hours into my 12 hour shift. From 0300-0600 I tend to become a zombie. I swear I have nearly fallen asleep while charting once or twice. Working the night shift has really made me re-think my career choice, maybe I should give up patient care and go into something like "landscape architecture".(Nobody dies because their ferns weren't quite placed in the yard right.) I will stumble through my front door in about 5 hours-flop down on the couch, turn on Elmo and pray my daughter lets me get at least an hour of sleep. The washer will still be broken, my son will still be talking back to the teacher, the hubbie will still be hard at work. So it goes. I still love my life, I am fortunate to a healthy hubby who is still on American soil and who I love with all my heart.

Military Spouse Blog Hop

Hi Everyone! I am new to the "blogsphere" but throughly enjoying it so far. I was obviously in need of an outlet to vent my frustration about our crazy life lately. Realizing I am not alone is just the icing on the cake. I know what we all have in common-our military men-it's the tie the binds us, but I am really intrigued by our differences, what makes us unique. I love getting to know people, I love hearing everyone's story...their history, what brought them to their own present day. We (military spouses) are a wacky bunch, we are all heart and determination-pure grit. It takes an amazing person to follow your true love to the ends of the earth, raise children (and furbabies, too) alone and wait patiently for that one beautiful imperfectly-perfect person we call Husband. I can't wait to hear what everyone has to say, real life is stranger than fiction and you all are a never ending novel for me to discover.
In case you are interested, I am an Army wife, mother of two (step mom to two more), liberal, artistic, big mouthed, amateur wine snob, evolved punk rocker.I am 32 years old. By trade I am a Respiratory Therapist, but lately find myself fulfilled by the role of Mommy more than anything. Currently the Army has us in Hawaii (it's rough-but I am sure we will survive). By no means am I a writer (so bear with me) but I am a communicator-I tend to "overshare" & sometimes I share "TMI". I am not religious, I admire those who are though. I am a realist, I will tell anything as it is. I don't sugar coat anything and I can be sarcastic. When I was small I wanted to be Carol Burnett or Goldie Hawn. I played with GI Joe dolls when I was a kid, you could say not much has changed. I love my life, I love my friends, I love my family and I can't wait to share this all with you. :)

I'm Almost Normal Now....

But in two weeks I guarantee I will need another therapy appointment with my good friend M. I have known M. for about 10 years now, longer than I have known my Husband. I met her in Kansas where we both "worked" at a call center, fielding calls from customers upset about their $500 cell phone bill. This was the place I learned how to "tell someone to go straight to hell and have them look forward to the trip". This was also the job that taught me that I needed a degree in something-anything, or else listening to Jim Bob complain about his cell phone service was going to drive me to an early grave. I have a lot of respect for this friend of mine, she is a surprise ray of sunshine in most circumstances. We survived working at loser central (there are a few exceptions-you know who you are) and have managed to stay friends. When we met she wasn't even married yet, so it is ironic that not only have we both ended up in Hawaii at the same time, but we both seem to find Hawaii less than paradise-like. ( we are in it together now) Funny, brave, honest and flawed perfectly-it is hard not to love her. She listens to me ramble on for hours on end about myself ( I am sure she is ever so glad I decided to start blogging, as I am sure she thinks I might shut up sometime soon). She didn't even say a word when I ordered one of those tacky purses made out of my Husband's ACU's, even after I spent two weeks laughing my butt off at how ugly they were (By the way, M-I ordered another one). M didn't even make fun of me when me I volunteered to to be the Point Of Contact AND the treasurer of the FRG after I swore I never would. She even tells me I totally could win "yard of the quarter" cause she knows that would be my one small win after being beat down for quite sometime now. Now that's a damn good friend.
Every two weeks or so we have a girls day - lunch and pedicures. And now all of a sudden I can breathe..... aahhhhhhhhh. I feel almost normal now. I have been fortunate to have at least one good friend at each duty station I have been at over the years. I have yet to have crossed duty station paths with any these fantastic sublime women twice, until now. It's nice to have M here and since we are both pretty much disenchanted with the Aloha spirit we have found comfort in each other's shared misery. We are both a work in progress-- when she wins-I win and vice versa. Back home in Los Angeles I had a lot of friends-all kinds of friends-different groups of friends. Here in Hawaii-I have M. I wouldn't trade 100 friends on this post for that one true good friend. :)

"Once you have the best you can’t settle for less”

For most of my life as an Army wife I have successfully avoided watching war movies. My theory being that most movies add to the drama by embellishing the intensity of certain situations, especially those that involve patriotic themes. I have a flare for the dramatic and an over active imagination as it is, watching these movies would do nothing for the cause of keeping me calm during one of my husbands inevitable deployments. David has recently convinced me to watch "The Pacific" on HBO with him. We really enjoyed watching the PBS documentary on World War II together, so I figured I would indulge him. (It was also a good opportunity to enjoy a glass of wine or two with him-who can say no to that?)
True to my original assessment, The Pacific is most certainly dramatic... and heart wrenching. If you haven't been watching, it is truly awe inspiring what these Marines went through on these islands. It makes you grateful for modern warfare tactics and as a soldier's wife, I find myself holding him even tighter than I did before. Especially after last nights episode. The focus last night was on Sgt. John Basilone and his life post- Medal of Honor and post-Guadalcanal. He eventually married a woman named Lena Riggi, who was also a Marine. Shortly after they were married he was killed on Iwo Jima.
I didn't sleep very well last night (despite the bottle of red we finished between us). I kept wondering what happened to Lena. If you live anywhere near So Cal you know that Camp Pendleton is covered with references to her famous husband, John. But-what happened to her? I wanted to make sure she recovered from her loss, I wanted to know she went on to have 6 kids and an exceptional life. Yeah, ladies--not so much. If you are a romantic you might love the ending to her Hollywood-like story, I included a link to her obitutary for all the details. But in her later years she summed up her life after John like this-"Once you have the best you can’t settle for less”. I imagine I would feel the same-there is just no topping my husband.

Sunday Morning....

Ahhhh, Sunday morning. Sometimes I feel like I wait all week for this. I have a mental check list that I go through just to maximize my Sunday morning experience. It goes something like this:
Wake up preferrably between 8-9 am
Shower ( if I can get a shower before Sasha wakes up it really makes my day)
Open every window in the house-(there is nothing like fresh morning air flowing through the house)
Make coffee (david like hot coffee-I prefer a tall cup of iced coffee)
Make a kick ass breakfast with everyone's favorites (pancakes, bacon, breakfast burritos, fresh blueberries)

I managed to get all the way through my Sunday morning checklist and I am feeling pretty good right about now. Like I mentioned before I am hell bent on "blooming where I have been planted", luckily today is making it easy to be in full bloom. Bonus round: Cade did not wake up grouchy and even took out the trash without being asked. There is a Laker game on, so David is beyond content and Sasha woke up saying the word "happy" over and over. I heart today.

Settling In and Settling Down (AKA-accepting what I cannot change-with grace)

We planned on getting orders to Hawaii, we planned on it even before we got married. We vacationed here, we looked at houses, schools, job prospects-all of it. I thought I was prepared, (being an Army wife -by nature- I tend to "over" prepare, if that's possible) However, I was definitely not prepared for living in a hotel for 2 months with our 11 year old and 18 month old. At the risk of sounding dramatic, I can only describe it as hell. Hormones, sleepless nights, lack of "alone time" eventually wore me down. And for sometime now I have been anti-Army, anti-Hawaii and basically a negative bitter person. Monsoon season hit, coincidentally, at the same time. It's almost May, we arrived here on December 29th-so 5 months later, the sun is shining a little brighter and so is my attitude. Although neither weather or my attitude are predictable on this island, so I reserve the right to complain at any time.
We moved into a fairly nice house on post, after some haggling with the housing office, at the end February. Army housing isn't what it used to be, let me tell you. While our housing assistant told us we would only qualify for a 3 bedroom home due to our family size, it seems that the rule did apply to our neighbors with similar family sizes. Being innovative by nature (it's a military thing) we converted our garage into a family room. And since I don't mind bragging, it's looks pretty freaking awesome. We scored a deal on a some rad bright orange carpet and put up posters of our favorite bands. With that extra space that house feels much bigger and I am not bitter about being shorted an extra bedroom. Our current project is the back and front yard. You may wonder why we put so much effort into a place we will only be living in for such a short period, I can only say that in the past (way past) living like a gypsy-never fully unpacking-made my mental health status poor. I need a space where I feel secure and at home. With that being said and the house taking shape, my perpetual sour mood is getting much better. Most days I reserve my crappy-"i-hate- this-stupid-island-and-all-Hawaiians" for before or after my shifts at my new job.
In the weeks leading up to our move to Hawaii I worried mostly for my son, moving him from his grandparents, his school, his friends seemed cruel. He however LOVES it here. And really what isn't to love, he only has school 3 1/2 days a week, the neighborhood is crawling with kids and when his behavior is good - he gets free reign over the post. He has a walkie talkie and bike-(see ya later, kid-come home when the street lights come on) I consider myself a good parent(no rhetoric from the peanut gallery please)-this concept may have offended my better judgment back home-I'm sure I'm still recovering from being stuck in the hotel with him for so long, or maybe I actually feel secure letting him roam this post. So far, he has behaved well on his own, so I'm sticking with it.
For the moment being I feel like I can breathe-possibly relax-for awhile. After the last few months- I think I deserve it. I really would love to love it here, but I don't-I think I'm just over complaining about it. (My husband would love this-he has managed to field every complaint with a smile and a hug for 5 months now-Buddha bless him) I'm reserving my really nasty attitude for next spring when my husband deploys. Enjoy the sunshine now, kids-ahahahahahahaha.